The Smart, Brave 'Idiot' in Meetings
Not initially knowing is not to be ignored. Seeking answers is paramount.
Being the confused one in business-and-workplace meetings may not be as much of a negative as we think. Maybe the bigger issue is not being willing to seek clarity.
Professionals and missions most profit from their people being curious and speaking up when communication isn’t creating full understanding, says Simon Sinek, a speaker, author on business leadership and a provider of leadership development training programs.
"I'm an idiot," he calmly admitted in an interview on Instagram. "I don't understand very complicated things. So I ask a lot of questions just so I understand it.”
He recalls a particular experience that made a memorable impression on him.
"A long time ago, I had a client. They invited me to sit in on a meeting from the consultant that they had hired,” Sinek says. “All the C-level executives sitting there, nodding — and I didn't understand a fricking word of it.”
Knowing that he was there to be helpful, he did what he knew the moment required.
"So I raised my hand and said 'I know I'm the only one here without an MBA but this doesn't make sense. Can you say it again please. I'm really sorry to slow the meeting down everybody,” Sinek remembers.
What happened next may be surprising to some readers.
“And one by one, all the C-level executives said, 'yeah I don't understand it either,” Sinek says.
He developed a conclusion from that day.
"Now, if the 'idiot (Sinek is talking about himself)' hadn't spoken up and said, 'I don't understand,’ they all would've nodded their heads for fear of looking stupid and they never would have used it and it (product or service) would have sat on the shelf,” he forecasts.
That’s why Sinek recommends professionals get comfortable with being curious and hungry for clarity and not care about the risk of looking like the only person in the room whom isn’t grasping what is being communicated. He explains why this needed.
"I'm ok being the 'idiot,” Sinek says with humility. “But the reality is, once I can get to where I understand it, I can say it in simple terms; that means that other people understand it too. There's a lot of value being the 'idiot.'"
Not every leader or presenter within an organization is welcoming of questions. The assumption may be that an attendee in the meeting should be able to pay attention, follow along and understand what is being presented. It’s vital to have someone who will always speak up or leaders to encourage others to do it.
“In any organization, we really need somebody willing to ask the ‘dumb questions,” says Heather Lamb, Ed.D., an author and workplace culture and well-being expert.
“Innovations and the clarities of collaboration are driven through curiosity — and curiosity is perhaps the most valuable tool at our disposal,” she adds.
“Leadership needs to be aware that as much as having an effective communication strategy is important, so too is having a culture of open dialogue, rather than one where we fear looking ignorant.”
The former drives beneficial conversations and progress while the latter leave increased room for ongoing ambiguity, stagnation and errors.
“When somebody stands up to ask a question, they’re not just making it easier for themselves, they’re giving others an opportunity who may feel too worried to speak up,” Lamb says.
“This inquisitiveness and perseverance in questioning assumptions to simplify the work process is one of the fundamentals in building an honest, transparent work culture.”
“Growing a culture of questions is vital to any business that flourishes,” Clark Lowe, president and CEO at the O’Connor Company, a non-residential construction company, has found.
It remains common that there are blockers to this practice.
“Many often recognize that ego kills innovation,” Lowe adds, “so why does this become so difficult at the highest levels? Those operators are often already highly skilled and regarded. It's what got them there. However, through the years of trial by fire, it becomes easy to lose sight of simplicity.”
Questions open minds, create feedback flows and bring added clarity for decisions.
“While the sophistication of business does increase as you move up the echelons, the questions that need to be asked are inversely sophisticated,” Lowe says.
“A great show that illustrates this concept in action is ‘Undercover Boss,’ where CEOs go undercover and perform jobs at the lowest levels of the company. And the insights that are gained are often profound — and incredibly simple.”
Leaders of meetings or the other leaders attending them can encourage curiosity, confidence and the assertive asking of questions to create an added comfort level.
There is another recommendation that can prove helpful.
“Fixed time slots can be set up to encourage employees to ask any questions,” says Alex Li, the founder of StudyX.AI, an AI education company. “For those employees who don't dare to ask questions face to face, an anonymous questioning platform can be established.
“Of course, the purpose of asking questions is to receive timely responses. Therefore, after employees ask questions, leaders and colleagues should provide targeted feedback, making employees feel that their questions are taken seriously and effectively resolved. Only in this way will employees build up their confidence in asking questions.”
His experience has led him to conclude that incentivization is a driver of success.
“I think the most effective measure is to regularly recognize and reward those employees who have solved work problems or brought new ideas through questioning,” Li says.
“Through such rewards and praise, employees can be motivated to continue maintaining a positive attitude of asking questions and exploring. This positive incentive can create a favorable effect within the team.
“More and more employees will recognize the value of asking questions and thus be more willing to take the initiative to ask questions and share their thoughts.”
“To make curiosity and bold questioning the standard, leaders must work to create a psychologically safe space,” Lamb says. “This begins with modeling vulnerability themselves — admitting when they don’t have all the answers and encouraging others to ask questions.”
Any leader within a collaboration, partnership or organization can be be a facilitator. What’s most important is that it gets done.
“Training leaders to foster spaces where questioning is embraced and anticipated is critical,” Lamb adds. “Officials may recognize the employees who helped generate productive discussions or new ideas, thus showing that asking questions and seeking clarity benefits all.”
This creates a culture that can and will improve in participation and development.
“When curiosity becomes part of the organizational DNA, it changes not just how work gets done, but how the employees within that organization are made to feel valued and heard,” Lamb says of the byproducts of the practice.
“As a CEO,” Lowe says of what he does, “I often lead through two simple statements ‘What's your recommendation?’ and ‘I trust your judgement.’
“I still assume, in just about all operational facets of the business, that I am ‘the idiot’ in the room, which often times, that is the case. I hire professionals around me to give me information to make informed decisions.”
Lowe is a believer that leaders “do” first what they want and expect of their people.
“Much like Sinek did in his example, the best way for leaders to do this is model the behavior that supports these traits,” he says. “Finding teachable moments that support development around curiosity, confidence and courage is fundamental.”
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