Leaders Inviting and Nurturing Blunt Feedback
How its done and what happens when it isn't taking place
Andrew Barban unabashedly advocates for creating a culture within organizations where leaders willingly receive and value bluntness. To him, it’s a critically-important factor, including reasons that leaders may not be aware of or fully realize, for operating at a higher, more effective degree.
Barban wrote about it earlier this month in the article, Why Truth Lives at the Edges, in his (Communication Intelligence-recommended) newsletter on Substack.
First, who is he? Barban “writes about leadership, communication and relationships and what drives work behind the scenes, why it works that way and what you can do to survive it or change it,” he details on his profile.
“Smart leaders,” he strongly asserted, “don’t just tolerate blunt feedback; they actively cultivate it.”
How and Why
“When someone brings a problem directly, they respond with ‘Thank you for telling me this’ before anything else,” Barban added. “They ask follow-up questions about the problem, not about the person’s communication style.
“They change the messenger-punishment cycle by protecting truth-tellers in performance reviews and promotions, actively rewarding accuracy over optimism.
This can more likely result in what leadership needs to know, regardless of how palatable or not the news.
“They speak bluntly upward, refusing to soften bad news for the board or sugarcoat problems for their boss,” Barban explained. In short, “They model the behavior they want throughout the organization.”
Note the appreciation, expressed curiosity, the protection provided (instead of defensiveness) to employees and the efforts to encourage continued confidence and assertiveness of the valuable communication behavior.
On the surface, this dynamic may not seem like it would be the norm or experienced as such in workplaces.
“A lot of leaders are perfectly comfortable being blunt with others — especially their direct and indirect reports — but they rarely create a culture where people can be blunt with them. Their direct reports learn quickly that it’s safer to only push so far, don’t openly disagree in public and avoid touchy subjects they’ve learned might trigger the boss.”
This, naturally, creates a problem of illusion.
“Instead of real dialogue, they get what a client of mine calls artificial harmony,” Kanthal adds. “On the surface, everyone agrees, but underneath, the contrarian builds: there are unanswered questions, dissenting views and unspoken concerns.”
The necessary and best communication connection isn’t transpiring.
“It becomes a one-way street,” Kanthal says.
“Blunt on the way down, silent on the way up.”
The root problem seems more evident to the people below the top levels of the hierarchy.
“Most leaders say they want direct feedback but when that feedback touches a nerve of who they are, how they behave or how they perform, the ego kicks in,” Kanthal says. “Until a leader can manage that human reaction and genuinely invite honesty, blunt feedback will never flow both ways.”
“In my experience, this type of leadership is relatively uncommon because it requires that the highest levels of leadership in an organization to welcome, proactively seek out, and incentivize these behaviors,” says Jenn Christison, a continuous improvement consultant, coach and workshop facilitator and founder at Seven Ways Consulting, where she helps senior leaders turn good intentions into deliberate action.
“Early in their careers, these leaders are celebrated and promoted,” she says. “Their team members and colleagues appreciate their honesty and tenacity. People feel heard and problems get solved.”
The top end of the organizational hierarchy needs to become psychologically secure to handle communication that may trigger them in some manner. Without this development, danger will continue to exist for the team and needed communication will be lacking or absent.
“Unless the executive team is deliberately looking to be challenged, ‘speaking truth to power’ is frequently interpreted as ‘lacking politically savvy’ or ‘a bad culture fit,’” Christison says.
Barban delved deeper about what he learned and works in practice.
Leaders who recognize the value of blunt feedback “create safe spaces for unfiltered feedback through regular one-on-ones,” he wrote.
“They ask direct questions:
‘What’s broken that I don’t see?’ ‘What would you fix if you were running this?’
“Most importantly, they respond to problems, not personalities. When someone says, ‘This policy is stupid,’ they often hear, ‘This policy creates problems I don’t see.’ They focus on the system issue, not the delivery method,” he crystalized.
Constructing This Capacity, Habit and Standard
One can look within themselves and begin the process there.
“It starts with the leader’s ability to regulate their own emotions,” Kanthal says. “If I’m (emotionally) hijacked, I speak with menacing tone and cadence — and that’s the truth for most leaders.”
He goes deeper to dissect the communication.
“We forget that blunt feedback often shows up wrapped in someone else’s triggered and reactive state because most people were never taught how to explore or manage their emotions in the first place,” Kanthal details.
“Once I ground myself, curiosity becomes the antidote to defensiveness,” he adds. “It slows the moment down and helps me focus on what the person is actually trying to say instead of how they said it. I also name what I’m experiencing to try and minimize a debate about two different realities.”
The Way
“Something simple like ‘Your tone caught me off guard, help me understand what’s behind this,’ keeps the conversation human,” Kanthal explains and suggests.
“Leaders who can do this consistently create environments where the truth flows both ways, not just when it is comfortable.”
Curiosity, responsibility, risk management and big-picture thinking are part of such a leader’s focus.
“These leaders view their role as that of coach or champion for their teams, as opposed to seeking status for being known as the person in charge,’” Christison says.
“Thus, engaging with team members and colleagues in a way that encourages transparency and problem-solving is inherent to how they approach their role and day-to-day work.”
In another of Barban’s articles, he reiterated the mandatory need for safety.
“You have to create protection first. Real protection,” he wrote. “Make it safe for people to reveal what they really think. Show them they will not be punished for asking real questions. Give them evidence, not words.”
Otherwise, he communicated as a reminder, “you are running a performance where people tell you what you want to hear.”
Communication Intelligence began as online magazine (2021-2024) on another platform and during that time, also became a free-or-paid newsletter on Substack. The C.I. brand additionally offers individuals and organizations a variety of services, from written communications as well as communication consulting and coaching.
The newsletter is written by a former newspaper reporter, magazine writer, talk show host and communications consultant and advisor.
Thank you. You make me sound way more intelligent than I am, but I am honored:)